Thursday, March 1, 2012

More Theories

SPOILER ALERT:  I have finished Fifty Shades of Grey and am about to start Fifty Shades Darker.

OK - another theory - could she be pregnant?  There was a bunch of non-foil packet sex going on in the last few days.  And we all know anything is possible.  Holy cow - what a twist THAT would be!!!  Can you imagine?  "Honey - can you take me out of these shackles so I can feed the baby, please?"

Thank God there is a second book for me to open today.  I don't know what I would have done if there wasn't.  Girlfriend left the car, the Blackberry and the shiny, silver, Hyperbionic MacBook (that one killed me the most) and went the hell home.  And I was cheering her on the entire time.  When she said "You need to get your shit together, Grey" I almost jumped through the book and hugged her.

Tell me you could not feel everything she was going through?!  We've all been there.  You know someone is bad for you in whatever way - but you absolutely love being with them...and you just have to get up and walk away.  It's truly one of the hardest things to do.  You walk away and feel worse than you did while you were there.  But you know being in that relationship is so wrong and so dysfunctional and in order to love yourself, you have to try to stop loving someone else...(not that you ever do.)

And not that that's ever happened to me before.  (whistles...looks at the sky)

Anywhoo...the whole situation killed me...because I wanted to slap both of them.  I wanted to slap Ana because things were going so well...and Christian was coming along nicely.  He said they didn't have to sign a contract (which, I don't know about you, but I found to be a HUGE step for him)...he called her his girlfriend...he said they'd sleep together...I mean, SHIT...things were panning out well for them.  And Ana kept pushing...and asking all the right questions at the VERY worst times.  (You're going to bring up Jose's art show in the shower, right after mind-blowing sex?  Really?  I'm sorry...are you an idiot?!?)

DON'T get me wrong - I totally understand and agree with her need for answers.  I guess I'm just old enough to know there is a way to handle things...and that you should be patient and let him fall in love with you.  I thought he was doing a stellar job.

As for Christian - my god, man - just fucking stop HITTING her.  WHY do you have to do this?  He said the answer would make her run screaming from the apartment.  Well - sister girl didn't scream - but she did get the heck out of dodge.  So what's the damned difference, man?  TELL her what the fuck is UP.  Give her a chance; she might surprise you.

That said...I can't WAIT to find out what his reason is.  I mean - duh - he was abused as a kid (I can't talk about that; it will make me cry.) But is there something else? Something I don't know about?

Oh and Christian?  STOP sticking up for Mary Kay LeTourneau, Mmmmm Kayyyy?  Elena (gag) is a C-H-I-L-D M-O-L-E-S-T-E-R.  Wake up and REALIZE that she FUCKED YOU UP as much as you CRACK WHORE MOTHER...just in different ways.

Although maybe thank her for the flogging lessons.  They seem to be kindof helpful. ;)

OK off to read Part Deux.  Wish me luck and meet me back here later today, y'all!

5 comments:

  1. Carol - Just catching up on your thoughts on book 1. Hee Hee!

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    1. Hi Diane! So glad you're here! :)

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  2. Totally agree......Elena, Mary Kay......funny!

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  3. Why do you think Ana didn't use one of the safe words? I don't understand why she let him continue hitting her. I realize you guys have already read books 2 & 3 (I'm always a day late and a dollar short!), but that's the question that popped into my mind. I had pre-ordered books 2 & 3 on Amazon; but won't get them for another month or so - oy, I might have to break down and buy the damn kindle sooner than I'd planned and cancel the pre-orders.....AGGHHHH!!

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  4. "Honey can you take me out of these shackles so I can feed the baby, please?"
    That has got to be your BEST LINE EVER!!!! I have tears rolling down my face and might have just peed a little!

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